‘Real Housewives of Orange County’ 16th season premiere offers ‘complete immersion into fabulousness’

When the 16th play of “The Real Housewives of Orange County” opened connected Wednesday, it felt a small similar we’ve slipped into an alternate beingness of coastal mansions and Botox injections and skinny margaritas.

Gone from the 15th play are housewives Kelly Dodd, Braunwyn Windham-Burke and Elizabeth Lyn Vargas, who person joined erstwhile stars Vicki Gunvalson and Tamra Judge successful The Vast Untelevised Place.

Only Shannon Storms Beador has outlasted the Great Housewives Purge of 2020 and 2021, though, hold a second: Is that a acquainted signifier lasting successful silhouette successful the doorway of her 22,000-square-foot Newport Coast mansion?

“Hello, guys? I’m back!” the shadowy fig announces, and Heather Dubrow has returned arsenic a housewife, 5 years aft leaving the show.

“Oh my gosh, what has been going connected successful the past 5 years?” Heather asks herself successful her archetypal confessional of the season.

Apparently, she’s been enjoying the heck retired of the location she and her husband, world TV prima and integrative surgeon Terry Dubrow, person built for their household of six.

Heather doesn’t truly deliberation it’s specified an ostentatious monument to the net and egos of a world TV powerfulness couple.

Sure, she admits she has nary thought however galore rooms the location has, but different than a literal movie theater, Heather is beauteous definite that these are the mean rooms you person successful immoderate home, conscionable a batch bigger. (The butler’s room begs to differ.)

For the astir part, this play opener is simply a table-setter for each the tables that whitethorn oregon whitethorn not get upended successful fits of pique aboriginal on. Everyone is connected their champion behavior. No 1 adjacent orders a portion until astir the halfway people of the episode.

That’s mostly owed to the request to rebuild the housewife universe. In summation to Heather’s return, 2 caller housewives request to beryllium introduced to viewers.

We conscionable new housewife Dr. Jen Armstrong first, arsenic she jabs Botox present and determination successful housewife Gina Kirschenheiter’s face, arsenic housewife Emily Simpson looks on.

“Just a small dab’ll bash ya!” Dr. Jen assures Gina arsenic the needle slips in.

We conscionable new housewife Noella Bergener erstwhile Heather’s person Nicole James brings her on to Newport Beach for luncheon with Heather, who is determination to publication the edifice to cater a enactment astatine her palatial pad.

“Historically, I bash emotion a party,” Heather says to the camera. “A Heather Dubrow enactment is simply a implicit immersion into fabulousness.”

Noella tells Heather that her lawyer hubby Sweet James is conscionable arsenic saccharine arsenic the nickname helium uses connected the billboards helium rents each implicit Southern California.

“He’s the sweetest, astir authentic man. It’s not a brand; it’s him,” she says.

Noella starts to archer Heather astir the clip she and Sweet James decided to permission a edifice barroom for a country upstairs.

“No 1 wants to perceive astir joined people’s enactment lives,” Heather declares.

“We person a enactment dungeon successful our house,” Noella cheerfully announces. “You volition emotion it. It’s precise chic.”

Heather demurs but offers her champion wishes for Noella’s aboriginal visits to the red-and-black country that flashes connected screen.

Across town, Shannon, Gina and Emily are astatine Lunch No. 2, and Shannon is starting to enactment herself up into a what-to-do-what-to-do existential crisis. She has realized thing astir which Heather is successful the dark: Years earlier, Heather’s adjacent person Nicole James had filed a suit against Heather’s hubby.

She blabs to Gina, who says Shannon indispensable archer Heather the news, but erstwhile Gina and Shannon conscionable Heather for Lunch No. 3 of the occurrence they don’t blab.

Instead, Heather offers to springiness Shannon and Gina the royal circuit of the rooms, nevertheless galore determination are, of her manse. Shannon, who lived successful a akin benignant successful the aforesaid vicinity until her divorce, has a look connected her look similar she swallowed her pridefulness and it didn’t spell down right.

Gina, however, is the cleanable guest, reacting to each the bells and whistles successful precisely the mode you ideate Heather had hoped.

“Oh, I emotion trap doors!” Gina cries erstwhile Heather reveals a concealed doorway successful the partition that leads from her bureau to her backstage bathroom. “I emotion a hidden potty!”

We spot the crippled room, the gym, the butler’s kitchen, and the laundry country implicit with an existent maid astatine an ironing board. In the kitchen, we conscionable the family’s cook and Heather shows disconnected the refrigerated drawers successful her cabinets.

“I didn’t adjacent cognize that was a thing,” Gina marvels.

By the clip we get to the maestro bath, with its heated towel drawer, it’s apt Gina is acceptable to secretly determination into the attic.

Then there’s Heather’s closet, which is arsenic ample arsenic galore of the boutiques astatine South Coast Plaza, though we’re not definite immoderate of them person a ample fastener connected the partition to property erstwhile you privation a solid of champagne delivered to your closet. As 1 does.

Meanwhile, Dr. Jen is the lone housewife to beryllium near retired of a luncheon date, since she is, well, astatine enactment being a doctor. We bash concisely conscionable her hubby Ryne and 3 kids, but her storyline is similar a treble chin, near to beryllium lifted successful immoderate aboriginal episode.

The time of the enactment arrives, and similar the Avengers, the housewives assemble astatine Heather’s hotel-like fortress. A ample crystal sculpture of Heather’s initials, H.D., arrives. A server brings champagne to Heather successful her closet.

And arsenic a montage flashes crossed the screen, we get our tease for portion 2 of the opener adjacent week: Gina volition archer Heather astir Nicole and the lawsuit.

And it volition not spell well.